Mindfully Blooming

Meeting -lower case c and Capital C- challenges along the way,  I met myself: my full, deep, shadowy, dark, Sparkly, proactive and anxious self.  All of the facets, all of the pride and shame,  All of the debilitating anxiety,  All of the faith in myself.  Overwhelmed and then reassured,  I was always guided along the way,  Even though at times I felt alone, I was always supported, held, loved. 

May the inhale be an invitation to receive, To open up to the sacredness of life, To welcome expansion,  To welcome nourishment,  To welcome love. And may the exhale be a reminder of how sweet it can be To release and give yourself permission to unclench, To sigh out, to let go, to release anything That no longer serves you,  And everything you're ready to drop. you're a human being, breathe.  You're a human being, be. 

 My throat bleeds the words she doesn't speak. The inflicted silences guarding my mouth, The constriction around my neck Like a snake silencing me tight; The shackles, the fire, the smoke Tearing me, burning me down; A hand choking me, water filling my lungs, Smoke seeping in through my nostrils  And I just want to unapologetically, wildly Scream and shout. I want to speak my pure, raw truth, I want to heal and guide and align,  Connect with sisters, and devotionally chant;  Honour the Great Mother, and be held in her light,  Humbly serve the aligned path without fear  Of the silencing of the words of my heart;  Know in safety, devotion, connection my path lies and with love and light abound, Nurture a community of aligned souls of the light,  And a witch and goddess be.  

Lingering on the edge a bit too long  I fell down a deep rabbit hole;  Unbeknownst to me  I'd been there before only I didn't  Remember the winding corners of the  Dark maze that my mind wouldn't let go of. Holding tightly, it felt like a safety blanket,  The devilish whispers that drew me closer  To self inflicted soul pain each time.  Until one enlightened day I suddenly realized  That it was I who had the ultimate power to  Drop the rope and let go or, rather, Hold on tightly to pull myself up and out of The entanglements that kept my mind numb.  Greeted by the blinding light as I got out I realised, once again, that the warmth that welcomed me back Was non-judgemental and kind,  Boundless and unconditional love.  I decided that, every time I shut down,  I'd breathe, I'd lean in and allow the darkness  Through and out of me. Yes, the shadows were  Part of who I was but so was the light.

And like that, we will hold you, And like that, we will guide you. Rest, my child, you're safe, Close your eyes, and know you're enough. Tender love, that's what you are.  Nothing to do, just be. Know you're guided and that life unfolds FOR you, Know you're loved and forever held.

In the eye of the storm she found herself, shaking, exhausted, shocked, in pain.  Blazing guns of noise and smoke had c louded her judgement of self; However, u nwavering determination to get back to the light propelled her away,  Away from  self- destruction and the endless cuts, bruises and blood she'd often shed.  The truth was, she was tired of fighting herself and in the glimpses of magic  She'd sometimes see whenever she looked at the sky, she could recognise a Familiar place she'd once emerged from. This ethereally peaceful place kept  Calling her back but at the time the demons would force her to shut her eyes tight.  Source knew she's eventually remember that all the pain wasn't punishment but   Lessons she'd agreed to learn on Earth, source also knew she'd find her way back to  The teachers and tools that would illuminate her way, reminding her she was a wise  soul f irst and foremost, not just blood and flesh; she was stronger...

In your wholeness I saw you,  And in your darkness I embraced you; Whole, pure, striking, dark and mysterious,  You were everything and nothing to the physical eye But you were more than the extremes And everything in between.  I saw myself reflected in you; oftentimes I asked you If you could teach me about me. I deeply believed that, as you changed, I changed; Every month an undeniable visual reminder That I was also changing on a moment to sweet moment basis And that it was s afe to embrace every shard of darkness and every blinding beam of light. I was e ncouraged by you to dance with both sides of me, And not to fear the unknown that  Happened in the sometimes blinding dark nights of my mind and soul. Because of you, I allowed myself to fully surrender my breath, To let out a howl and a deep sigh, To beam under your light, To let a watery pearl run down my face because I was Struck by your beauty to my soft core, The flesh and bone and blood cor...

Today you're okay, today you're safe, and thriving; today you've had a good day and today you're loved. There's nothing you have to  do , just be. In your beingness you're blessed with expansion and alignment. When you obsess about all the details, you constrict yourself, you cap your growth, you clip your wings. But you're meant to fly beautiful one, you're meant to soar high up into the pinks and blues and darks of the sky, into all the colours, and directions and depths of the sky above; through valleys and jungles, and deserts and cities.  You're here to experience it all, to  feel  it all. But the more you think, the more you numb, you shut down and the more you fear but, why fear?  Love, love it all! The hard, the ugly, the breathtaking; the pure and the impure, the light and the dark; the beauty and the tears for it is all meant to be experienced.  Breathe. Each time, breathe and feel. Breath will anchor you in whatever it is you're experi...