Mindfully Blooming

October was waving goodbye when anxiety stubbornly decided to pop by. Out of nowhere, it pranced and sat on my chest,  Unapologetically digging its claws and refusing to walk away.  I could not catch my breath, a nightmare while awake.  Negotiation was null and void- no point even trying to beg it to go.  Even though my mind was refusing to accept anxiety was back again,  My soul lovingly reminded me that healing was a winding road,  With turns, and obstacles, and detours; definitely not a linear path. Wanting once again to retreat into a dark cave wasn't going to  Bring peace and ease or healing and forward momentum; I'd learnt  The more I got to know myself that I couldn't reduce myself to  Anxiety's childish and selfish level, I had to allow it to be and express itself;  Regardless of how negatively I perceived it to be, it actually was  Reminding me of the things I had to yet heal.  With much patience and willingness to wan...

I thought I had to go, n o point in staying,  My heart was begging f or me to listen to t he whispers a nd intuitive nudges. The storm had been unfolding, l ightning threatening the horizon,  Thunder kept growing louder and louder;  I thought I was just  s kin and bones, flesh and blood. But eventually I realised I was also magic and light alive   And I couldn't help being reminded, every time I breathed,  That I was worth each breath on Earth, That my soul had a purpose here,  That I was yet to fully embody it all.  That's how I embarked On the peeling of layers of my sacred healing journey.  And how my awareness sweetly developed; Staying stuck in the rejection of my sacredness and  Goddess beingness wasn't an option anymore.  Rejection of self, rejection of my humanity, rejection of  My sacred womb and ancestral trauma had made me disconnect Deeply from one simple truth: I was nature, loved and eternal.  My healing had ...

I lost myself and then I found me again.  Breath following me around  Reminding me to fully let it in; I'd forgotten how to be, forgotten I was human.  It felt easier to dissociate  And numb it all out; I belonged to a different galaxy:  Starseed living a human life  And I struggled to blend in Only because I was meant to stand out. Light inside, darkness too, Humanity was heavy and I cocooned; Couldn't wait to return to what it felt like home, Thousands of light years away And ethereally calling me back. 

Worlds were collapsing and so was I, in my mind I had nowhere to run  So I decided to face the debris and smothering, dark clouds.  Smoke, coughing, not knowing what was going on; Fear joined briefly for a while and I knew I had to let it be,  No point in pretending I was brave then But my faith had taught me I was immensely stronger than I would give myself credit for; darkness had engulfed me before  And I'd made it alive so I'd keep embracing the parts of me that  Were pure, eternal, strong and bold.  Smoke eventually dissipated, shy flames died down; I realised that I was standing on solid, breathing grounds. Foundations were charred but the earth was alive, Teaching me that fire would always bring nourished new life. I stopped fearing, I befriended pain, I knew  I couldn't keep running away from The lessons   I was meant to embrace. I sat with the heaviness  Of my chest, I let it be. Eventually, it dawned on me that The beauty of my...

In the sacredness and nourishment of our womb,  We burn bright and thrive aligned;  We shine from deep within, we connect to the source of it all.  Cherishing our womb, we celebrate the sweetness of this portal,  The waters that are and give life, the blood that is our power,  The sanctuary of our sacred soul.  We cherish and honour our goddess energy, we tune in to the elixir of life; In our sacred chalice we receive divine guidance , We create and co-create with higher power, We savour and delight in the sweetness and pleasures;  We cry, we moan, we succumb to the pulsations of life In the contraction and expansion that is this sacred universe.  We honour the ebb and flow of the sacred waters,  We retreat and then we shine, We are reminded that light follows darkness and that  Healing, however  imperceptible , is happening on a Moment t o sacred, rageful, blissful moment basis.    

The Earth shook and things fell, Crumbling down to the foundations of what they used to be.  I knew then nothing had been in vain for the process of  Lovingly building what was had showed me the power Of mindful and soul-led creation.  What was beautiful back then had started cracking naturally,  Not because of faults but because something more beautiful  Was emerging.  I'd learnt to let the cracks reveal themselves so that I could  Witness the layers underneath.  Not always comfortable but I knew that patching things up Defeated the purpose of the unbound and emerging truth of Nature and creation.  I'd learnt that there was deep beauty in the imperfections And the natural flow of sacred unfolding.  I was profoundly grateful for the crumblings,  The shaking, the darkness, the valleys, the cracks That were revealing to me I was a wild, sacred one.