Leap

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The leaves were turning ochre, cherry and amber and she knew. She knew the season of engulfing darkness was lingering all around and she feared it. She feared the darkness, the extreme silence and the fading light; she feared the ticking clock of light and the solitude of her days, the distance between him and her, the neverending steps to maybe one day take. 


And yet, she embraced it all for she knew that every day had its night and that every light had its dark; she knew that silence allowed her to be with her deep, raw thoughts and that, despite the lingering demons, she could grow and learn and move forward. Every day allowed her to learn something new and the unknown seduced her. Her curiosity was deeper and more powerful than her fear, her tears came from a longing rooted in her soul and she could not let go; she had to carry on and discover what she was being called to do. 


Crawling, walking, running. It didn’t matter how she did it but she knew that something had to change, that her life was morphing, that she had to leap. The universe kept telling her: first whispering, then shouting, pleading with her to jump, to thrive, to live her desired life; the universe kept begging her to leave her fears behind, the voices in her mind, the stares from the outside, and the claws and ropes from her conditioned mind. ‘Stop. Pause. Breathe.’ She kept telling herself that her clarity came from engagement and she could do it, that she could break that barrier between dreams and reality but she had to commit herself. No one would do it for her. Only she could create the life she wanted.  


Time. Yes, time. It takes time, she kept telling herself. But time is relative, it is a construct, it is an illusion. Sweet time, precious time, unique time. Time to create, to nourish her soul with things that brought her joy. Time to leap. 


The universe kept reminding her that it was okay to cry, to mourn, to slow down and pause but it also kept reminding her to not let go of what she wanted despite how scared she might be. 


Keep going. 

Even if it is one slow step at a time. 

One fear left behind. 

One promising step at a time.

Keep going for you will find

That the sky will greet you 

With each waking up. 

With each decision to make the day count

You will thank the universe 

For letting you try. 

Allow. Leap. Please, just try.


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